An Aaron Story for your Entertainment

Kick back, grab a drink, maybe a napkin in case you spit out your drink as you laugh your butt off, and enjoy.

Rewind 6 months ago and continually, over and over, since then, your 6 year old is responsible and listens to you as you tell him to take out the trash and the recycle. Occasionally he takes that to mean to take the cans to the street when, in fact, it isn't pick up day the next morning. So he's got to bring them back in.

I digress. Over this time he takes out the trash through the front door to the cans which reside on the side of the garage. He CONTINUALLY forgets to lock the door when he comes back in. This is a thing. A continual thing.

Friday. A few days ago. He takes out the trash and the recycle at my insistence. We leave for school, I go to the gym, I pick up Delaney, she and I return to the house to hurriedly pick up the dogs for their vet appointment. And we had to catch lunch on the way because the clinic is not close to home.

I've painted the picture? We're kind of in a hurry.

Pulling up to the house I notice there is a package that was delivered for Chuck. During my handful of trips through the house with my Costco loot, I run to the front door to pick up said package. And that's when I see it. The door. And it's unlocked. Our doorknob doesn't keep the door closed, it just bounces open. So it's imperative that the deadbolt is locked. Translation? The UPS guy could have totally just walked into our house.

Oy. I've been reading this book called Love and Logic. It's basically all about natural consequences. No yelling (which I've been working on for about 3 years). It's like this:
Mom-figure: Hey, Ned. Would you like to pick your toys up or would you like me to?
Ned: You can. (And proceeds to do his next thing or go to bed or whatever.)
Mom-figure picks up the said toys and hides them and teaches the little turd a lesson.

I have another friend who is also reading this book. The one I'm currently reading is actually geared toward a younger crowd, more age appropriate for my kids. So I consult this friend.

I choose to hide ALL of his Legos:

I choose to hide his most prized weapons:

I choose to take and hide his most favorite blankets and all his pillows:

And then his candy bag (all his candy is in one bag and since I don't make many desserts, they get a piece of candy after dinner. Sometimes):

Here's the funny part about the Legos...As I'm packing them up into their bins, Delaney is watching me. And I know she's going to tell Aaron because neither of my kids can keep a secret by any stretch of the imagination. So I coach her.
Me: "Delaney, Aaron did something that he wasn't supposed to do. And it was very naughty. So I'm taking his Legos. I don't want you to say anything to him. If he asks you where his Legos are, don't say a word. JUST do this... :SHRUG:" (a big, innocent shrug complete with a head tilt and a stretch of the mouth)
Delaney: "Okay."
Me: "What do you say if he asks you about his Legos?'
Delaney: ":SHRUG:" (it was perfection)
Me: "Good."

Then we run out the door with the dogs to McDonald's and then to the vet clinic. Then we have time to run the dogs home, barely. Then we can stay and play after school.

Fast forward to coming home with Aaron. My first stop is the bathroom but through the door I hear Delaney baiting him, calling him toward the Lego table so she can either tell him or show him her shrug (probably the former). Nipped that in the bud.

The kid is already grounded from his Legos by his dad. But he does notice that they are gone. He asks and I call him to the table and walk him through what happened that morning (he realizes he left the door unlocked. he's not stupid) and have since decided (devised my plan) that someone came into the house through that door and must have taken his Legos!!

About 30 minutes later he is looking for his weapons. I told him apparently they took those as well!! Things are starting to sink in.

Then, about 30 minutes after that, he notices that his pillows and blankets are gone. Wailing and gnashing of teeth. He was so upset. Very sad. One of the things in the book is to acknowledge their sadness. "I'm sorry that you're so sad, Aaron."

Chuck is still at work at this point. He had to stay late. He gets home around 7, I fill him in quickly, and we eat dinner. Aaron proceeds to ask about his dessert, can he go get a piece of candy and it hits me....I hid the bag. So I kick Chuck under the table and we both snicker a little as he continues to look for the candy.

He's looking and looking and I ask him to pick a piece and come back to the table. And he turns around and says he can't find it. With my most surprised voice and many octaves, I say "THEY TOOK YOUR CANDY, TOO?!?!?!"

I'll tell ya. It was quite the afternoon/evening. Wow.

Bedtime rolled around and he scrounged around for a pillow pet to sleep on and they conked out, together, because Delaney wanted to bring in her own pillow and sleep on his bottom bunk.

Fast forward to Sunday and we conspire with a friend at church. A...public servant. Chuck put all of Aaron's things in his truck and when it was convenient this friend took Aaron aside and took a police report. Took down all of his information (which, by the way, I am a failure as a mom because my kid doesn't know his address yet), the story, what the punks (Delaney's words, not mine) took, etc.

Now. This is important. If:
* you know our friends here,
* know people we go to church with,
* know or have an INKLING who this may be,
please do not say anything in the comments or in any other way. He is very protective of his identity and does not like his image online, hence my crazy mad photoshop skills on this image and I intend to respect his privacy.


He continues with "we recovered some stuff. I want you to come out to my truck, take a look, and let me know what's yours and what's not."

They proceed outside, he's telling Aaron that he needs to remember to lock the door or this could happen again.

It's all there. He's so happy.

However the candy is still missing. I want him to have the bag back but I can't decide whether to get rid of the candy or not (I'm leaning toward dumping it). I feel like he needs a lasting consequence.

Anyway, I hope I've been entertaining to you today. Would love your comments (I always love comments but people haven't left me a comment in, um, years...). However, I DO NOT need your opinions questioning/criticizing what my kid did or how I/we dealt with it.