THAT was a weird day because it was my first alone with Aaron. I drove to a mall near the airport to feed him because I wanted him to be hungry again for a MOMs group. Then he doodied in his diaper and it came out on my pants, that was nice. Then we tried to have lunch with a couple friends and they were all busy, which was fine because I have to get used to being along with him anyway! Then I was going to grab lunch at the Burger King on the base, the drive thru line was super long so I was going to go in, but the dining room was closed for renovations and it was too late to turn around, I was stuck in the drive thru line to waste gas. Then the soda I got didn't have enough syrup in it so it tasted funny and the fries were cold! Then I go to this MOMs group (for some nursing tips) and it took forever and I was super uncomfortable because of all the nursing moms. It was just weird, I understand some people have no problem being in a room like that and just feeding their kids, I just don't feel comfortable doing that!
It took forever for the consultant to get to me so Aaron was super hungry and fussy and attracting a lot of attention. And long story short, they basically told me I was letting him do things to me that I shouldn't and changin positions coule help. But, let's put it this way, she gave me wound dressings. The one thing that is super important to me in the first year of his life...I couldn't do it right! And being hormonal, which luckily I wasn't too bad during the pregnancy, was hitting me hard. I was so upset.
Yesterday was a little better. I got a call from my good friend Heather, who's wedding I'm in next weekend (!!!yeah!!!) so that was really nice and we kept busy. Didn't do a whole lot, but we kept busy. Today was much better, not so hormonal, kept busy...did some laundry, cut the grass (all of it), made a Walmart run, and now I'm going to go feed him again and then fold the laundry.
I want to attach some pictures from the last couple of days (well, maybe this past weekend). I promise I'll be much better at keeping this up once I get a routine down. It takes so long for me to actually get moving in the morning with feeding Aaron and then keeping him awake for a bit before he falls asleep on me and then take a shower, etc. I'll be better, give me a break!
These are all my coworkers. It was so nice to go back and see all of them!!!
3 comments:
I am amazed at how well you are getting around (cutting the grass?!!!). I was sore after a little walk around Target at two weeks. Good for you!! Don't worry, you will settle into a routine. And then he will change :) Keep those pictures coming!!!!!
Nursing gets MUCH better, I promise! And maybe then you will be one of those women who's comfortable doing it anywhere - I seriously would nurse my baby anywhere I wanted to, and I didn't care if other people gave me dirty looks (and I live in the South, so people definitely gave me dirty looks). And what is your husband thinking letting you cut the grass?? It sounds like you're doing great and settling in well. I'm a little jealous - I miss having a newborn :) Enjoy this sweet, sweet time!
I second Tiana. Nursing gets much much better! I actually love nursing Haddie now and look forward to those close times. I cried through most of my nursing sessions for the first 3 weeks. Haddie had a bite down reflex and I experienced shooting pain as a result in addition to the normal soreness that comes from adjusting to nursing. I knew before she was born that I wanted to nurse her for at least the first year.
I was so frustrated, emotional and discouraged. After three weeks I decided that I couldn't take it anymore and after many tears I decided to try formula. I stopped nursing cold turkey for 2 days and gave her nothing but formula. It was horrible. Her little system did not handle the formula well at all. I didn't realize at the time... but Haddie is not tolerant of dairy... which would explain why she didn't handle formula which is milk based. She cried every waking moment for 2 days straight. I decided that I needed to make breastfeeding work regardless of how painful it would be. Thankfully Haddie took right back to me (I was really blessed that she wasn't confused or refused to breastfeed at this point). Unfortunately at this point my supply had nearly dried up and I was only producing about a 1/2 an ounce every 3 hours. I spent 2 days of doing nothing but breastfeeding, cup feeding (b/c I wasn't producing enough food) and pumping (to rebuild my supply). It was horrible... but, totally worth it. Thank goodness my milk supply came back. This time I was totally committed to breastfeeding regardless. It was still painful, but over time the pain went away as I healed and Haddie and I got the knack of nursing. I experience no pain when I nurse now.
I guess I said all that to encourage you to keep going. I know that it is so tempting to give up, but you are nearly through the worst of it if you'll persevere. Our hormones being all out of whack certainly doesn't help matters :)! Your in my thoughts and prayers as I was just where you are a few weeks ago. It gets better... I promise!
As for nursing in public... I'm with you. I'm a very private person and it totally made me uncomfortable. I ended up buying a nursing cover from bebe au lait (bebeaulait.com) which I absolutely love and it has made nursing in public much easier (it goes around your neck and opens up top to where I can see her). I've decided that my baby has to eat and as long as I'm covered there is no reason for people to be offended. If they are it's their problem. At first I tried to hide when nursing in public (bathrooms, dressing rooms ect.) But there isn't always a place to hide and it's just ridiculous. We wouldn't expect a bottlefeeding mom to hide away when feeding her baby... why should we expect a nursing mom.
Sorry for the long comment! Good luck!
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